grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
