seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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