we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
