my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
