Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
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