Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
