i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Congratulations! We have a period
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