What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
