is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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