hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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