I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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