If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Randomize
