It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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