So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
