I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Maybe he injected his testicle?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
