So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
