So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
