what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
