He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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