Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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