Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
