U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
