Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
