She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize