Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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