okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Randomize
