A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Sacagawea was the original milf.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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