Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize