hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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