he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
