Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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