This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
