So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
