So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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