So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
You are a genius and a whore.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
