whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
