Well douche your snatch and let's go!
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize
