I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
