Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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