If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Randomize
