my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
