I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
