Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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