you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
