We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
