Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
