Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
