Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
