This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
