You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
She told me I should be a condom model.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Randomize
